Creative Nonfiction

Visceral

Gershom Mabaquiao October 10, 2023

Recently, I discovered a poem entitled “Aswang” by Barbara Jane Reyes. Readings of the poem relate it to the subversive nature of powerful women. But the moment I chanced upon it, it reminded me of what I first learned about aswangs in my Philippine History class years ago, especially in the lines which read: “I am the bad daughter, the freedom fighter, the shaper of death masks.”

Reyes’ aswang never stayed the same way. She became “the snake, the crone,” or “the grunting black pig” or “your inverted mirror.” She shifted not to what the other person would deem desirable, but in the very creatures which would frighten them.

By the end of the poem, she dared the reader to “burn me with your seed and salt / Upend me, bend my body, cleave me beyond function. Blame me.” It was a powerful statement. Prodding the accuser to do the very thing they do best– inflict violence against those who challenge what they view as attractive, as normal, and as good. Read More

My Other Name

Gilford Doquila June 22, 2021

I was five when I learned I had another name, besides what my parents gave me. The name was first born out of my younger sister’s anger who never understood my difference—which for her and other kids were unusual and difficult to comprehend. For them, the world operated in black and white. Dolls are for girls; cars and toy guns are for boys. I wouldn’t blame them, we were taught to see the world in such banality and convenience.

But growing up was tough if you happen to be in the gray area. 

As I ran my soft little hands and patted it against the black silky hair of my sister’s limited edition Barbie doll—donned in gold Filipiñana, beaded in intricate red gumamela patterns, and crowned with pearls towering on her head like those queens in Sagala, I was caught in a trance, mesmerized in an unknown cadence of beauty that I can’t help but adore. I continued patting her, held her brown legs, making sure not to spoil the crisp sparkling saya shaping her hourglass figure. I lifted her slim brown arms, waving them like queens do. She was beaming with her white teeth framed in her cherry red lips. I giggled in adoration until I heard my sister’s voice.

Maupay (At Mga Katagang Waray na Di Ko Malilimutan)

Raya Martinez June 22, 2021

1. Maupay nga aga (kulop o gab-i) – magandang umaga, hapon o gabi. 

Magiliw ang wastong kataga. 

Madalas tayong magpalitan ng mga “maupay” – sa umaga o gabi – depende sa iyong kagustuhang sumagot. “Maupay man,” ang tugon sa kumustahan. Mabuti naman. 

Madalas kong tingnan ang cellphone ko. Palagian kong ina-unlock, sakaling may nakaligtaan akong text mo. Kung babatiin mo rin ba ako ng maupay na kung isulat mo ay “maupai”. Kung sasagutin mo ako ng okey na kung isulat mo ay “uki po.” Madalas din akong nagpapanggap na may itatanong o hihinging pabor – paki-salin mo naman ito sa Waray; may maitutulong ba ako sa inaayos niyong papel? Sasamahan ko ba si Alice bukas sa miting niyo? Mga palusot para lang mapahaba ang usapan natin sa text.